Healthy body, healthy spirit, healthy mothering. This is the journey I have set out on with my two amazing children.

Friday, May 02, 2008

May 9

I got completely blindsided this morning. Too early. I was checking my email and I got a reminder from my e-card site that Dads birthday is on May 9. Now, I am already very aware of when dads birthday is. It is marked on all of my calendars with a sad face. But I was determined to be ok right up until his actual birthday. I have no classes that day and I already took the day off from volunteering at the kids' school so that I could just chill at home and pretty much avoid the world.

Crap.
Crap.
Crappity Crap Crap.

Stupid email reminders. Now I have to go in and delete my dad so that this doesn't happen to me next year. This will be the first of anything Dad-related that I have erased. He is still in my email address book. He is still in my phone with a work number (even though I have transferred phones since he died.) Mom's new house is still listed under "Mom & Dad" so that I see his name whenever I get a call. He is still in both of my photo accounts to automatically send pictures of my kids. He is listed in all of my address books, the one in my car, the one in my purse & the one I keep on my desk.

I am just not ready to delete dad.

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