Healthy body, healthy spirit, healthy mothering. This is the journey I have set out on with my two amazing children.

Saturday, June 23, 2007

affection

I've come to the realization, in the past few days, that I am a person who gives physical affection. I am not talking about anything sexual. I just am a toucher. I come from a family of touchers. We hug, we kiss, we touch a persons arm when we are speaking to them. My kids come to me several times a day, just to sit on momma's lap and to snuggle or be held. I love to rub their heads or their arms when I am holding them. Shoot, I still occasionally like to snuggle with my mom and I am 32 years old. Everytime I am ending a phone conversation with a family member (or close friends) I end with "I love you". My mom and my sisters are the same way. Well, most of my sisters. One of them used to be this way but she has changed quite a bit in the past couple of years. But this is not about that.

Point is: I have learned that I need this touch to feel somehow connected to a person. Is that odd? I am struggling with this realization because now I am dating a man who is not a toucher. Members of his family are not touchers. They don't show affection or say the "I love you"'s everyday or even, apparently every month. My mind is struggling with this concept.

Perhaps it is the mexican in me. I mean, even if you have not seen your tia or tio or prima/o in YEARS, when you do see them again, you get a big ol' hug and most likely a kiss on one or both cheeks. Is that just a mexican thing? But that can't be entirely right. My father (my mexican side) is NOT a toucher. My mother is and she is as white as white can get. (Irish, German & English-by way of Canada) Mom is the toucher.

Shoot! The more I try to figure this out, and the more I see it as I am typing, the more confused I get.

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